


I Know You

by DestinyFreeReally



Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-23
Updated: 2016-09-23
Packaged: 2018-08-16 21:38:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 611
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8118439
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DestinyFreeReally/pseuds/DestinyFreeReally
Summary: S7 before "you're the one"





	

      "They were _right_ , though. That’s the thing. I was General Buffy. More a soldier than a slayer or a mentor. I know some of them will die, Spike. And they know, too and it’ll be my fault. If I survive.“ Buffy should’ve known he’d find her. She wanted to be alone so naturally Spike would be around. She shrugged off that feeling, she hardly wanted to be alone. The world had just gotten so messed up.  
   

     "Bloody nonsense. You’re the reason they _all_ won’t die; you’re the sodding reason there’s still a world for them to try and save at all, love.” Spike was angry, knuckles in white fists, reminding himself her anger came first here. It had to. And more than anything his still-new soul felt heavier than ever and he could see the Slayer hurting. So badly. By her own friends, even.

   
      “Why are you here, Spike?” Her voice softer than either of them expected. Nobody else wanted to be there. God even she didn’t want to be there.

    “Got no place else to be, pet. Where else should I be? Buffy’s hurting… I got my place in that, I guess.” She watched his blue eyes lower to his feet. They both knew it was well, _beyond_ complicated. With them it always had been. 

     “How can you be so _calm_ and _reassuring_ and god, _stable_? The world might end because of me. It’s bigger than my hurt feelings, Spike. How can you act like everything isn’t falling apart?” Buffy almost laughed.

  
    “How can you act like it wasn’t always this broken? I told you once your place wasn’t with them.” He heard her sigh, lightly. But she didn’t interrupt. “For the wrong, selfish reasons then, yeah. You don't belong in the shadows with me, either. But it’s always been uneasy with them, hasn’t it? Especially the last few years; Watcher, Red, even the Harris ninny, even Dawn. They don’t understand you, pet.” He looked to her, both of their eyes watering, neither wanting to be the first to give in to tension and gravity of the situation. “You’ve been stronger, better, more powerful than the rest, for years now. Perfecting your art, perfecting your craft, of dea- Slaying. You’re the best the world’s ever seen. They should be throwing you parades, and building Buffy statues, out of marble and cheeses or something, I don't know. At the very least they could listen to your advice that has saved their bloody lives time and again.” His nostrils. “And will again. Back to wall, you win. Hell, I couldn't beat you so I joined you. They're idiots to think they stand a chance without you. Even half a chance. Against whatever big bad is here now, whatever’s to come. You’re ready, Slayer. You know what to do. You always have.” Spike wasn’t sure when, but somewhere along the line Buffy had taken his hands in hers. Now she pulled him close, leant into him, flooding him with the scent of her and the scent of fear and resentment and anger and resolve.

  
     “How can you be so sure?” She felt her shoulders shaking against him, and heard herself crying like she hadn’t cried well... Since the last time she died. She let go of the last weeks of stonewalled motivation and exhaustion. Buffy buried herself in the smell of cigarettes and cheap liquor, and burrowed against his chest, guessing she was making a mess of his shirt but she couldn’t care about that. There was so much she couldn’t care about anymore; she couldn’t be expected to care about, and yet she had to anyway.

  
    “I know you, pet. I know.”


End file.
